A patient was waiting nervously in the examination room of a famous specialist.
"So who did you see before coming to me?" asked the doctor.
The patient answered, "My local General Practitioner."
"Your GP?" scoffed the doctor. "What a waste of time! Tell me, what sort of useless advice did he give you?"
"He told me to come and see you."
Quote by a forest ranger at Yosemite National Park on why it is hard to design the perfect garbage bin that will prevent bears from breaking into it:
A friend and I stayed at a Chicago hotel while attending a convention. Since we weren't used to the big city, we were overly concerned about security.
"Always clap for your friends, even if their dreams come true before yours."
"May we think of freedom not as the right to do as we please, but the opportunity to do what is right."