One of the best marksmen in the FBI was passing through a small town. Everywhere he saw evidence of the most amazing shooting. On trees, on walls, and on fences there were numerous bull's-eyes with the bullet hole in dead center.
The FBI man asked one of the townsmen if he could meet the person responsible for this wonderful marksmanship. The man turned out to be the village idiot.
"This is the best marksmanship I have ever seen," said the FBI man. "How in the world do you do it?"
"Nothing to it," said the idiot. "I shoot first and draw the circles afterward."
"In matters of style swim with the current; in matters of principle stand like rock."
"Isn't it amazing that God gives breath to a man who is going to blaspheme Him all day?"
A father used to say to his children when they were young: —When you all reach the age of 12 I will tell you the secret of life.
The manager of a large city zoo was drafting a letter to order a pair of animals.