An elderly man took his young grandson for a walk around the local cemetery. Pausing before one gravestone he said, "There lies a very honest man. He died owing me 50 dollars, but he struggled to the end to pay off his debts, and if anyone has gone to heaven, he has."
They walked on a bit further and then came to another grave. The old man pointed to the gravestone and said, "Now there's a different type of man altogether. He owed me 60 dollars and he died without ever trying to pay me back. If anyone has gone to hell, he has."
How to have a beach body:
"If someone makes you happy, make them happier."
Diane was getting real discouraged over the lack of finding a steady man in her life.
"God, please give me the confidence of a 25 year old life coach."