My daughter spent the night over at my mom's house one weekend. She is 4 and full of mischief.
My mom told her, "You must behave if you want to stay again overnight.”
My daughter looked at her and said, "Yes your Majesty Princess Gramma of Coolness!"

In a fancy restaurant in Columbia, a rich patron started to choke on a bone. A man rushed over, reassured the Yuppie that he was going to be all right and identified himself as a doctor. He performed the Heimlich Maneuver. The bone popped out.
It was Palm Sunday and, because of a sore throat, five-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm branches.