Don't let anyone tell you you're getting old. Squash their toes with your rocker.
Some people try to turn back their odometers ... not me ... I want people to know why I look like this. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads were NOT paved.
Maturity means being emotionally and mentally healthy. It is that time when you know when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say WHOOPEE!
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
You know you're getting old when everything either dries up or starts to leak.
Alcohol is a very effective dissolving agent. 
Little Johnny was reading from a Hans Christian Anderson book.
I know that I shall never see
"Fear does not stop death - it stops life.