1) If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
2) If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights.
3) Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
4) For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
Judi strolled up to a guest at the party. She had heard him addressed as doctor and now she said coyly, "Doctor, may I ask a question?"
"Certainly," he said.
"Lately," said Judi, "I have been having a funny pain right here under the heart . . ."
The guest interrupted uncomfortably and said, "I'm terribly sorry, Judi, but I'm a doctor of philosophy."
"Oooh," she said, "I'm sorry!"
She turned away, but then overcome with curiosity, she turned back. "Just one more question, doctor. Tell me, what kind of disease is 'philosophy'?"
“If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.”
- Dorothy Parker
“The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.”
- G.K. Chesterton
The minister of a well-attended, strong, and enthusiastic church often showed himself ready and able to deal with any situation that might come up.
One Sunday, just as the minister was reaching the climax of his sermon, his own young son entered the church, ran to the center aisle, started making loud beeps and brrrmms like a car without a muffler, then zoomed right toward him.
The minister stopped his sermon, pointed directly at his son, and commanded, "Jimmy, park the car immediately beside your mother on that bench (pointing), turn off the ignition, and hand her the keys."
The sermon continued undisturbed after a good laugh by the congregation.
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Our collection of inspiring quotes.
A discussion about Truth and Reconciliation with two members of the Wiikwemkoong First Nation, and a member and Chief of the Aundeck Omni Kaning First Nation.
To find and watch other parts of this video series, visit the playlist at:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsFiYkm76UF_Jrx2dFpJLuBqbUJ1NXNPA