The minister of a well-attended, strong, and enthusiastic church often showed himself ready and able to deal with any situation that might come up.
One Sunday, just as the minister was reaching the climax of his sermon, his own young son entered the church, ran to the center aisle, started making loud beeps and brrrmms like a car without a muffler, then zoomed right toward him.
The minister stopped his sermon, pointed directly at his son, and commanded, "Jimmy, park the car immediately beside your mother on that bench (pointing), turn off the ignition, and hand her the keys."
The sermon continued undisturbed after a good laugh by the congregation.
A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store and he does a double-take. He recognizes that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable, so he walks casually into the store and offers to buy the cat for two dollars.
“It seems I have spent a lifetime of mouthing mechanically, ‘Say thank you. Sit up straight. Use your napkin. Close your mouth when you chew. Don’t lean back in your chair.’ Just when I finally got my husband squared away, the kids came along.”
"Prayer is the vital breath of Christians; not the thing that makes us alive, but the evidence that we are alive."
A husband took his young daughter to the grocery store with him. In addition to the healthy items on the carefully prepared shopping list, they returned with a box of sugar-laden cookies.