Entertainment

Cowboy: Could you help me round up my eighteen cows?

Me: Sure. That will be twenty cows.

I started out with nothing and still have most of it left!

The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was.

Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children,

"Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if that's your pa in there."

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

There's not much Cybersalt news today (that's fit to print ?) so I thought today I'd share a fun YouTube video with you. It'a great reminder that humor is one of the things in life that transcends culture.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim

Today's CleanLaugh

Super Dress

Shortly after the birth of their second child, a husband offered to take his wife shopping for a new dress. He endured more than two hours of listening to her complaints about which figure flaw each dress accentuated.

As she emerged from the dressing room, having tried on the last selection, she asked for her husband's opinion. By this time he had learned just the right things to say.

"It's perfect!" he exclaimed. "It makes your waist look smaller, your legs look longer, and slenderizes your hips."

Just then another lady in the dressing room spoke out.

"If there is a dress here that will do that, I'll buy them all!"

Today's One Liner

One-Liner #1447

Make yourself at home! Clean my kitchen.

Today's Clean Pun

On Your Mark; Get Set; Don't

Believe me, I am not a racist. At my age I can't even walk fast.

Today's Quote

Quote #1885

"Gossip dies when it hits a wise person's ears."

- Unknown

Today's Illustration

NO CHARGE

A little boy came up to his mother in the kitchen one evening while she was fixing supper, and he handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his Mom dried her hands on an apron, she read it, and this is what it said:

For cutting the grass: $5.00
For cleaning up my room this week: $1.00
For going to the store for you: .50
Baby-sitting my kid brother while you went shopping: .25
Taking out the garbage: $1.00
For getting a good report card: $5.00
For cleaning up and raking the yard: $2.00

Total owed: $14.75

Well, his mother looked at him standing there, thought a few moments then picked up the pen, turned over the paper he'd written on and wrote:

For the nine months I carried you while you were growing inside me: No Charge.
For all the nights that I've sat up with you, doctored and prayed for you: No Charge.
For all the meals, snacks and drinks you've consumed over the years: No Charge.
For all the trying times, and all the tears that you've caused through the years: No Charge.
For the toys, clothes, and even wiping your nose: No Charge.

Son, when you add it up, the cost of my love is: No Charge.

When the boy finished reading what his mother had written, there were big tears in his eyes, and he looked straight at his mother and said, "Mom, I sure do love you". And then he took the pen and in great big letters he wrote:

"PAID IN FULL"

~ Sung by Steve and Annie Chapman.
https://store.steveandanniechapman.com/collections/music/products/a-mothers-touch-1

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.