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Entertainment

Taking It With You

Details
Published: 14 September 2017

Picture of PenniesAn old penny pincher had no friends. Just before he died he asked his doctor, lawyer, and pastor to gather around him at bedside.

"I have always heard that you can't take it with you. But I want to disprove that theory," he said. "I have $90,000 under my mattress, and when I die, just before they throw the dirt on me at my burial, I want you each to toss in an envelope with $30,000 within."

The three attended the funeral and each threw his envelope in the grave. On the way back from the cemetery, the pastor said, "I must confess. I needed $10,000 for my new church, so I only threw in $20,000."

The doctor then said, "I must confess too. I needed $20,000 for a new hospital I was opening up, so I only threw in $10,000."

The lawyer looked at them both and shook his head. He then said, "Gentlemen, I'm surprised, shocked, and ashamed of you. I don't see how you could dare to go against that man's final wish. I mean, I threw in my personal check for the full amount!"

Last Updated: 14 September 2017
  • Doctor Jokes
  • Pearly Gates Jokes
  • Pastor Jokes
  • Money Jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Death Jokes

Star Wars

Details
Published: 28 July 2011

Star Wars pun about Luke Skywalker and eating.One day, Luke Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi were at a very fancy dinner party they had hosted. They were seated in full view of the rest of the people in attendance, and Luke, his table manners somewhat lacking, was devouring his bantha meat with his bare hands.

Obi-Wan, sensing that this display of savageness was rather disturbing to their guests, leaned over to Luke, and whispered:

"Use the fork, Luke!"

Last Updated: 13 September 2017
  • Clean Puns
  • Movie Puns
  • Star Wars Puns

Actual Elementary School Excuse Notes

Details
Published: 27 January 2007

classroom*  "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because Jerry couldn't remember where the school was."

*  "Ronnie would not finish his work last night.  He said his brain was too tired of spelling."

*  "Eric hurt his knee in a karate tournament over the weekend.  He won his age group, but was in too much pain to do his math assignment."

Last Updated: 13 September 2017
  • School Jokes
  • Kid Jokes
  • Family Jokes
  • Teacher Jokes
  • Children Jokes
  • Communication Jokes

Read more: Actual Elementary School Excuse Notes

One-liner #1224

Details
Published: 12 September 2017

The relationship between husband and wifeThe relationship between Husband and Wife is very psychological - one is Psycho and the other is Logical; now please don't try to figure out Who is Who.

Last Updated: 14 September 2017

Sewing Machine Ad

Details
Published: 16 August 2017

Poorly worded ad causes trouble.The following is an ad from a newspaper which appeared four days in a row - the last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day's mistake.

MONDAY:

For sale: R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M.. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap.

TUESDAY:

Notice: We regret having erred In R. D. Jones' ad yesterday. It should have read "One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 948-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly, who lives with him after 7 P.M."

WEDNESDAY:

Notice: R. D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad stands correct as follows: "For sale: R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who loves with him."

THURSDAY:

Notice: I, R. D. Jones, have no sewing machine for sale. I intentionally broke it. Don't call 948-0707 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper, but she has now quit.

Last Updated: 09 September 2017
  • English Jokes
  • Advertising Jokes
  • Newspaper Jokes
  • Communication Jokes
  • Funny Newspaper Ads
  1. Turnip
  2. One-liner #1223
  3. Lieutenant Tact
  4. Math Pun 1

Subcategories

Clean Jokes Article Count:  3612

Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you?  Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 2173
 

Christmas Jokes Article Count:  77

a picture of christmas ballsWe think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

Your Turn to Be Funny Article Count:  3

It's your turn to be funny.  Submit your funny caption today.

Funny Elephant Pictures Article Count:  16

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures?  You've come to the right place!

Cybersalt Digest Archive Article Count:  13

Games Article Count:  15

Here are the games we have on the site so far.  There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Funny Pictures Article Count:  679

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow.  We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often.  Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

Funny Car Pictures Article Count:  169

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Funny Cat Pictures Article Count:  231

catmelonhead150x127.jpgOver the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

  

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 2173

 

 

 

Funny Dog Pictures Article Count:  149

dog_maggie.jpgSome say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Funny Horse Pictures Article Count:  24

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

Funny Christmas Pictures Article Count:  53

christmas cakeWe think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Pearly Gates Jokes Article Count:  541

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes.  Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

FunBlog Article Count:  534

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here.  If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

Cartoons Article Count:  3119

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Backpew Article Count:  2944

Clean Puns Article Count:  1885

Our collection of puns.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 2173

 

Funny Signs Article Count:  167

Our collection of funny signs.

One-liners Article Count:  1941

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners! 

Chicken Humor Article Count:  1

Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart! 

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