What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin π
A young, new Christian went to his local small town church one weekend. He came home and his wife asked him how it was.
"Well," said the young man, "It was good. They did something different, however. They sang hymns instead of regular songs."
"Hymns," said his wife, "What are those?"
"Oh, they're okay. They're sort of like regular songs, only different." said the young man.
"Well, what's the difference?" asked his wife.
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Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
I have been blessed to be working with a business coach in recent weeks. I wasn't really looking for one, and had anyone asked if I needed to talk to one I might not have answered yes. Apparently, because of what seems like divinely organized circumstances, it would seem God noticed I needed help and skipped asking if I wanted or needed one and provide me one anyway.
Last Friday, during our time together, I was explaining to him about "Chicken Thursday" and how many people think of me when they see chickens and send then me chicken pictures, cartoons and stories. (BTW, in school there were a few kids that looked at me and saw a chicken.) The whole thing has become a lot of fun for me and it seems many of you enjoy it too.
Well, until today maybe, lol. This week D. McCordic (who hit a home run by sharing that Dave Coverly Cartoon a few weeks ago) emailed me and shared a link to what one might describe a "chicken video."
Before you watch it, I want to apologize for what this may do to your ears, your brain, and maybe even to your day. I put the blame fully on her for sending me something she knows full well I don't have the taste, discernment, or self control to not pass along.
I would also like to apologize to the Pachelbel family for taking part in the mauling of the beautiful musical piece their ancestor composed. Johann Pachelbel passed away at the age of 52 in early March of 1706. While I am sure many viewed his death as having come too soon, we now know it was a blessing that he was taken before he could hear this video. Surely, if he were alive today, he would want to shoot me out of a canon! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khOfSVULtsU
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing their contract's sick-leave provisions.
One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper.
"This man," he announced, "Called in sick yesterday!"
There on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.
The silence in the room was broken by a union negotiator.
"Wow," he said. "Think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"
I have become more optimistic and now believe that things could get worse.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
Matchmakers like to strike up a light conversation.
"You may think you can live fine without Christ, but you cannot afford to die without Him."
- C. H. Spurgeon
There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to be able to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him.
An angel hears his plea and appears to him. "Sorry, but you can't take your wealth with you."
The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He might bend the rules.
The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him. The angel reappears and informs the man that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, the man gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed.
Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven to greet St. Peter. Seeing the suitcase, St. Peter says, "Hold on, you can't bring that in here!"
But, the man explains to St. Peter that he has permission and asks him to verify his story with the Lord.
Sure enough, St. Peter checks and comes back saying, "You're right. You are allowed one carry-on bag, but I'm supposed to check its contents before letting it through."
St. Peter opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly items that the man found too precious to leave behind and exclaims, "You brought pavement!!!???"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
I must admit I don't get away with very much, and I never have. It's not that I never try. It's just that whenever I try to get away with something, it always backfires.
I wish there were a class somewhere entitled, "How You Can Get Away with Anything." I certainly would sign up. But I haven't found it yet.
Every time I do something behind the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage's back, she always turns around. I don't know if she has eyes in the back of her head or if it's just women's intuition. Believe me, I will not investigate this subject.
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
I have become more optimistic and now believe that things could get worse.
A mom was carpooling her Sarah and friend Melanie to Hebrew School one day when she caught wind of the conversation between the two six-year-olds in the back seat...
Melanie, "Our family is kosher"
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
