A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location.
"It's only a stone's throw away from the beach," he was told.
"But how will I recognize it?" asked the man.
The reply was, "It's the one with all the broken windows."
Click here to view this edition online!
Pastor "Attacked" in ChurchSunday greetings everyone!
You may have noticed that when one of you shares something with me, which I turn around and share here, I usually change your first name or last name to an initial when giving credit. I do this primarily for privacy reasons, and also because I know most people don't want to be publicly associated with me.
But today, I'm going to mention Cybersaltine, Pastor Phil White, fully by name because he deserves our support after sending this video of him being "attacked" in church - and his name also fully appears in the video, so duh!
Now, for those of you who are squeamish, don't worry, the video is not graphic. And to tell the truth, it seems like Phil enjoyed this attack. He actually seems kind of desperate for any kind of attention or activity in his sanctuary.
The way he handled this situation makes me wish I could visit his church. I like to think that if I did, he would invite me back to his house for lunch afterwards for a time of good food and company - during which I would excuse myself and sneak into his closet and steal some of his killer ties! Seriously, check out some of his other videos because he's got the tie thing down!
Click here to watch the video.
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
I understand the fix a local hunting guide got himself into.
His party became hopelessly lost in the mountains and they blamed him for leading them astray.
"You told us you were the best guide in Colorado!" they asserted.
"I am," he said, "but I think we're in Wyoming now."
Overweight: Living beyond your seams.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
"Forgive me Father, Pastor, Vicar, Padre, Priest ... for I have synonymed."
- Curier Black | Inheritthemirth.com
"Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation."
- John Silver, Black Sails
A young, new preacher was walking with an older, more seasoned preacher in the garden one day. Feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was asking the older preacher for some advice.
The older preacher walked up to a rose bush and handed the young preacher a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing any of the petals. The young preacher looked in disbelief at the older preacher and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of God for his life and ministry. But, because of his great respect for the older preacher, he proceeded to try and unfold the rosebud while keeping every petal intact . . .It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do.
Noticing the young preacher's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the older preacher began to recite the following poem:
It is only a tiny rosebud
A flower of God's design;
But I cannot unfold the petals
With these clumsy hands of mine.The secret of unfolding flowers
Is not known to such as I.
GOD opens this flower so sweetly,
Yet in my hands, they die.If I cannot unfold a rosebud,
The flower of God's design,
Then how can I have the wisdom
To unfold this life of mine?So, I'll trust in Him for leading
Each moment of my day.
I will look to Him for His guidance
Each step of the Pilgrim's way.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
We had a long, hard week with problems and difficulties that took time to solve, if they even were solved. It is quite interesting to me that when I solve one problem, two other problems appear. I think they’re all waiting in line.
In particular, one day was rather difficult and zapped both of us of energy. I ordered a new desk for my office, and there were so many problems getting it delivered that I almost gave up. Along the way the desk was damaged and they returned it back to the store without even telling us. We had to reorder it all over again and wait for it. But then it came. Problem solved.
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
"Forgive me Father, Pastor, Vicar, Padre, Priest ... for I have synonymed."
- Curier Black | Inheritthemirth.com
Overweight: Living beyond your seams.
I understand the fix a local hunting guide got himself into.
His party became hopelessly lost in the mountains and they blamed him for leading them astray.
"You told us you were the best guide in Colorado!" they asserted.
"I am," he said, "but I think we're in Wyoming now."
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
