To the person who stole my camouflage jacket and my flip-flops ... you can hide, but you can't run!
Entertainment
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At my funeral, I would like there to be a piñata so people can be happy ... but filled with bees so they're not too happy.
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Take One
A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!"
The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!"
The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him."
"Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"
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I told my daughter to go to bed because the cows were already sleeping in the field.
She asked me what that had to do with anything and I told her, "It means it's pasture bedtime."
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Here are some actual maintenance complaints generally known as squawks or problems submitted recently by real pilots to maintenance engineers. After attending to the squawks prior to the aircraft's next flight, the maintenance crews are required to log the details of action taken as a solution to the pilots squawks. The following are some recent squawks and subsequent responses by maintenance crews.
(P) is the problem logged by the pilot, and (S) marks the solution and action taken by maintenance engineers.
(P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
(S) Almost replaced left inside main tire.
(P) Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
(S) Autoland not installed on this aircraft.
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