Cybersalt News
Resurrection Sunday greetings everyone - the Lord is Risen!
You would think that after watching as many fail videos as I have, I would know better. And yet... here we are.
On Friday I did the thing. The thing I should not have done. And the wipeout that followed was, shall we say, spectacular — evidenced by the fact that as I was struggling to get back on my feet, someone nearby said they wished they had caught it on video.
It's good to be young at heart. It really is. But I am learning — slowly and painfully — that my body does not bounce the way it used to.
There's an interesting evolution to falling down as you age:
When I was a kid, I'd cry because it hurt.
When I got a little older, I'd feel embarrassed because people saw me fall.
Now that I've reached the age I have... I just feel bad for the people around me who are mortified because they just watched an "old man" go down.
Today's video share is a repeat of an old favorite: The Plate.
Click Here To Watch
Enjoy the rest of today's Digest.
~ Pastor Tim
Reading at Lunchtime
A Jewish man took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench and began eating. Since Jews do not eat leavened bread during the eight day holiday, he was eating Matzoh, a flat crunchy unleavened bread that has dozens of perforations.
A little while later a blind man came by and sat down next to him. Feeling neighborly, the Jewish man passed a sheet of matzo to the blind man.
The blind man handled the matzo on both sides for a few minutes, looked puzzled, and finally exclaimed, "Who wrote this junk?"
One-Liner #2013
If I had a dollar for every time algebra has helped me in real life, I'd have x dollars.
A Funny Look
I read that giraffes can grow up to 18 feet.
The ones I've seen only have four.
Quote #2449
The Birth of Christ is the eucatastrophe of Man's history. The Resurrection is the eucatastrophe of the story of the Incarnation. This story begins and ends in joy. . . . There is no tale ever told that men would rather find was true. . . . This story is supreme; and it is true. Art has been verified. God is the Lord, of angels, and of men - and of elves. Legend and History have met and fused."
- J. R. R. Tolkien, On Fairy Stories, 78
Stethoscope Wonder
A nurse on the pediatric ward, before listening to the little one's chests, would plug the stethoscope into their ears and let them listen to their own hearts. Their eyes would always light up with awe, but he never got a response equal to four-year old David's comment.
Gently he tucked the stethoscope into David's ears and placed the disk over his heart. "Listen," he said..........."What do you suppose that is?"
David drew his eyebrows together in a puzzled line and looked up as if lost in the mystery of the strange "thump, thump-thump" deep in his chest.
Then his face broke out in a wondrous grin and he asked, "Is that Jesus knocking?"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
Retiring My Insanity
After some months of intense reflection, I have come to the conclusion that it is time for my insanity to retire. The evidence before me is so overwhelming that I'm not sure I have any other choice. And believe me, I have looked.
Not that I haven't benefited from my insanity. Looking back over my years, I can't help but notice how my insanity has been a positive thing in my life. I never would've thought this way before, but after considerable thinking, I believe this is so.
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
A Jewish man took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench and began eating. Since Jews do not eat leavened bread during the eight day holiday, he was eating Matzoh, a flat crunchy unleavened bread that has dozens of perforations.
If I had a dollar for every time algebra has helped me in real life, I'd have x dollars.
I read that giraffes can grow up to 18 feet.
A life-long city man, tired of the rat race, decided he was going to give up the city life, move to the country, and become a chicken farmer.
People's IQs should be presented like the weather:
I just accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes.
"Being a mom means never buying the right amount of produce. Either everyone suddenly loves grapes, and a week's worth are eaten in one afternoon, or fruit flies are congregating around my rotting bananas."
Jesus: Follow me
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the 