Martha Stewart's recipe for chicken casserole is to boil the chicken in water and to then Dump the Stock.
Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.
Click here to view this edition online!
Oh Look Chicken Thursday - and happy 25th anniversary to the Cybersalt Digest!
That's right, today is the 15th anniversary of the sending out my first newsletter. That first edition went on September 28, 1998 through an email list I created and named "Pastor Tim's CleanLaugh List."
At that time the list was managed through onelist.com, which eventually was bought by YahooGroups. In time, I was unhappy with the lack of control I had over the type of ads that YahooGroups was inserting in my email, so I learned how to host and send out the newsletter on my own.
There is much more history and stories to tell you about how that first newsletter grew into the ministry and business that Cybersalt is today. Unfortunately my plan to put that all together has suffered from a surplus of good intentions and a deficit of time to do so. But, for now, let is suffice to say that I am grateful and thankful to Jesus for the huge blessing all things Cybersalt have been in my life, and for wonderful blessing you all have been as part of Cybersalt! Grandma Cybersalt and I appreciate every one of you!
If you would like to read the first joke sent out on that day, here is the link:
www.cybersalt.org/clean-jokes/brave-firefighters
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
~ Pastor Tim
Mr. Johnson, a businessman from Wisconsin, went on a business trip to Louisiana. He immediately sent an e-mail back home to his wife, Jennifer (JenJohnson).
Unfortunately, he forgot his wife's exact e-mail address and the e-mail ended up going to a Mrs. Joan Johnson (JJohnson) of New Jersey, the wife of a preacher who had just passed away. The preacher's wife took one look at the e-mail and promptly fainted.
When she was finally revived by her daughter, she nervously pointed to the message, which read: "Arrived safely, but it sure is hot down here."
(How to politely tell someone they are not very bright.)
Wisdom has always been chasing you, but you have always been faster.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
A boating magazine ran a contest for clever boat names. The following names reeled in the honors:
Brace Yourself (owned by an orthodontist)
Sir Osis of the River
Aqua Seltzer
Out to Launch
Watertight Alibi (owned by a lawyer)
Meals on Reels
The Merri Yot
and, from a landscape contractor, Yard Buoy.
"Our prayers may be awkward. Our attempts may be feeble. But since the power of prayer is in the One who hears it and not in the one who says it, our prayers do make a difference."
- Max Lucado
Whatever you dwell upon in your mind, you give power to. So of course it makes sense to focus on what you want rather than what you don't want. Yet there are many ways in which the things you don't want can sneak into your thinking.
Worry and doubt focus your thinking on what you don't want. Rather than worrying about the bad things that might happen, direct your actions toward making positive things happen.
Complaining can also get your mind sidetracked into thinking about what you don't want. What do you complain about? The things you don't like. Rather than complaining, take action. Action moves you toward what you do want.
Anger is one more way to get your thinking negatively directed. Rather than getting angry about what you don't like, use that energy to give you determination for what you want to achieve.
Keep your mind positively focused on the good things that life can offer. Those things will grow stronger and more abundant in your world.
- Author Unknown
"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
- Philippians 4:8
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
In growing older, I noticed a strange phenomenon. The older I get, the more I forget. I remember things that happened in my youth and the pressure of those memories is, are they true, or am I just making them up? I have nobody to verify those memories.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
A policeman arrives at the scene of an accident, in which a car smashed into a tree.
The officer rushes over to the vehicle and asks the driver, "Are you seriously hurt?"
(How to politely tell someone they are not very bright.)
Wisdom has always been chasing you, but you have always been faster.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
