Entertainment

A young fellow just starting into cattle ranching called the old cowboy one rainy evening and said he had a cow with problems having a calf.

The old cowboy got his rope, and drove thru the rain to his neighbor's house. The cow was standing out in the rain with her calf next to her. The old cowboy thought she should be examined anyway.

"Has she ever had a rope on her"?

"Oh, yeah, yeah! Last year!

The old cowboy twirled his rope over his head and made a perfect cast. As soon as the rope went over the cow's head, she bolted. In a dead run, she pulled the old cowboy around the corral on his stomach, full length in the mud, three times around the corral. The old cowboy finally got her stopped, and looking at the young man in a rage said," I thought you said she'd had a rope on her before!"

"I had a rope on her last year, and she did the same thing."

Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?

Great food, but no atmosphere.

While driving through Buffalo after a heavy snow storm, a motorist noted a cop, apparently waist deep in snow, directing traffic. Feeling sorry for him, the motorist called out "I'm sorry you have to work half buried in the snow."

The cop called back "Don't feel sorry for me, feel sorry for my horse!"

What do you call an eternity?  Four Goobers in four cars at a four way stop.

Why do Goobers have TGIF written on their shoes?  Toes Go In First.

Three Goobers were driving to Disneyland.  After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said, "Disneyland Left" so they turned around and went home.

What do SMART Goobers and UFO's have in common?  You always hear about them but never see them.

What did the Goober say when she opened the box of Cheerios?
Oh look, ...Doughnut seeds.

Why did the Goober stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
Because it said concentrate.

At a pharmacy, a Goober woman asked to use the infant scale to weigh the baby she held in her arms.  The clerk explained that the device was out for repairs, but said that she would figure the infant's weight by weighing the woman and baby together on the adult scale, then weighing the mother alone and subtracting the second amount from the first.

"It won't work," countered the woman.  "I'm not the mother, I'm the aunt."