I do not think -- therefore I am not.
Here is the illustration of this principle:
One evening Rene Descartes went to relax at a local tavern. The tender approached and said, "Ah, good evening Monsieur Descartes! Shall I serve you the usual drink?".
Descartes replied, "I think not.", and promptly vanished.
Oh look, chicken Thursday!
There is a new funny picture page on the CleanLaugh site. It demonstrates perhaps my only hope at improving my golf score:
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/easy-par
There is also a new entry in the Simply Susan blog. You can read "Suddenly it's March" at:
http://www.cybersalt.org/simply-susan/suddenly-its-march
Enjoy the rest of today's digest.
The first salute received by a freshly commissioned Second Lieutenant is always significant. It's symbolizes authority and prestige.
When I pinned on my new Air Force gold bars and stepped out to face the world, I encountered a staff sergeant.
He gave me a snappy salute and said, "Good morning, Lieutenant. Your hat is on backwards, sir."
"How's Business?" asked the bystander.
Said the street cleaner, "Things are picking up."
"Technology is dominated by two types of people: Those who understand what they do not manage. Those who manage what they do not understand."
"Common sense isn't."
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Two patients limp into two different medical clinics with the same complaint. Both have trouble walking and appear to require a hip replacement. The first patient is examined within the hour, is x-rayed the same day and has a time booked for surgery the following week.
The second sees his family doctor after waiting a week for an appointment, then waits eighteen weeks to see a specialist, then gets an x-ray, which isn't reviewed for another month and finally has his surgery scheduled for a year from then.
Why the different treatment for the two patients?
The first is a Golden Retriever. The second is a Senior Citizen.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.
The first salute received by a freshly commissioned Second Lieutenant is always significant. It's symbolizes authority and prestige.
When I pinned on my new Air Force gold bars and stepped out to face the world, I encountered a staff sergeant.
He gave me a snappy salute and said, "Good morning, Lieutenant. Your hat is on backwards, sir."
There is a new funny picture on the Cybersalt Site today. You'll find it at:
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/honking-in-traffic
Thanks to everyone who has been checking in with me on my recovery from this nasty cold/flu/plague I have been fighting the last 13 days. I went to the walk-in clinic today and emerged 2 hours later with a prescription for a puffer. When I picked it up at the pharmacy I found out it has 200 doses. Now everyone wants to be invited to my party this weekend. Yes, I'm just that kind of a sharing guy. In fact, there is a song in the FunBlog today that shares how I feel about all of you.
http://www.cybersalt.org/funblog/if-my-nose-was-running-money
Enjoy the rest of today's digest.
A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.
Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point."
The next class the professor handed the graded tests back out. This student got back his test, his test grade, and $64 change.
"The display of still-life art was not at all moving."
"Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it."
"What you do in life depends upon what you are and what you want. What you get from life depends on how much you want it -- how much you are willing to work, plan, cooperate and use your resources. The long span of the bridge of your life is supported by countless cables that you are spinning now. That is why today is such an important day. Make the cables strong."
~ L.G. Elliott
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
One day during cooking class, the teacher, Mrs. Jones, was extolling her secrets for preparing perfect sauces.
When she ordered us to the stoves to prepare our assignments, she said, "Don't forget to use wooden spoons."
As I stirred my sauce, I contemplated the physics behind the mystery of the wooden spoon, and decided it must have something to do with heat conduction.
I approached Mrs. Jones to test my theory.
"Why wooden spoons?" I asked.
"Because," she replied, "if I have to sit here listening to twenty-three metal spoons banging against metal pots, I'll go nuts."
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
