At 82 years old, my husband applied for his first passport.
He was told he'd need a birth certificate, but his birth had never been officially registered. When he explained his dilemma to the passport agent, the response was less than helpful.
"In lieu of a birth certificate," the agent said, "you can bring a notarized affidavit from the doctor who delivered you."
I am happy to report that the Cybersalt Site migration to updated software has reached the point to where the new site is now live. If you notice any problems with it, please don't hesitate to send me a note. Undoubtedly there will be little things that pop-up here and there. BTW, "the jokes aren't funny enough" is not something I can fix.
To get back in the swing of things, there is a newly updated funny picture on the site. You'll find "Baby Pots" at:
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/baby-pots
Enjoy the rest of today's digest.
New Englanders are known for their dry wit and logic.
Once in Martha's Vineyard a hotel clerk asked me if I wanted a room with a shower or a tub. I asked what the difference was.
He replied, "Well sir, in a tub, you can sit down."
My doctor e-mailed me asking if I knew my "blod group". I replied, "typo."
"Do the right thing because one cookie would just be afraid by itself in the dark, right?"
"All generalizations are false."
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
While walking through the woods one day, I was surprised to hear a child's voice. I followed the sound, trying in vain to understand the child's words. When I spotted a boy perched on a rock, I realized why his words had made no sense: He was repeating the alphabet.
"Why are you saying your ABC's so many times?" I asked him.
The child replied, "I'm saying my prayers."
I couldn't help but laugh. "Prayers? All I hear is the alphabet."
Patiently the child explained, "Well, I don't know all the words, so I give God the letters. He knows what I'm trying to say."
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.
New Englanders are known for their dry wit and logic.
Once in Martha's Vineyard a hotel clerk asked me if I wanted a room with a shower or a tub. I asked what the difference was.
He replied, "Well sir, in a tub, you can sit down."
Today's Cybersalt Digest is brought to you by:
Shhhhh . . . . . It's that day again.
Somebody call Lassie because Timmy has fallen down a well - the well of migrating (which is way different than upgrading) the Cybersalt Site from Joomla 1.5 to Joomla 1.6.
I'm about 54% of the way through the process and hope to make the updated site live some time today- if all goes well.
Enjoy the rest of today's digest!
If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh/whatsagoober
Two goobers meet on a dusty country road. One of them is carrying a big bag labeled, "chickens."
"Chickens, eh?" says one guy. "Hey, if I guess how many chickens you got, will you give me one?"
"Heck," says the guy with the bag, "iffin you guess right, I'll give you both of 'em."
The other scratches his head and guesses, "Um... five?"
"A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished."
"The other day I nearly succumbed to a bout of narcissism: seriously, I just don't know what's come over me, me, me, me."
"Whatever you are, be a good one."
~ Abraham Lincoln
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Barbecuing - It's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do.
When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the following chain of events is put into motion:
(1) The woman goes to the store.
(2) The woman fixes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils, and takes it to the man, who is lounging beside the grill, drinking a beer.
(4) The man places the meat on the grill.
(5) The woman goes inside to set the table and check the vegetables.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.
(7) The man takes the meat off the grill and hands it to the woman.
(8) The woman prepares the plates and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
(10) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off."
And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
