"If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?"
Vinny raised his hand and answered, "One dollar."
The teacher shook her head. "You don't know your math."
Vinny replied, "You don't know my father."
Here is an illusion you don't have to be David Blayne, David Copperfield, or any other magician named David (for that matter) to be able to afford to do.
As for how to create this optical illusion yourself, you are on your own. I'm no illusionist - though I do think I could saw a woman in half if she were a mannequin.
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There is the Law of Gravity - And then, there is the Law of Parenthood
A child's behavior will improve in proportion to the distance she is away from the parent.
Two is equal to two, except when referring to time. Two minutes of tantrum lasts 20 times as long as two minutes of quiet time.
The choice of a preschooler's best friend corresponds directly to the distance the friend lives from your house.
A child's enjoyment of a popular entertainment will be inversely proportionate to the parent's enjoyment.
The chance of a surprise visit by your parents-in-law is directly proportional to the size of the mess in your home.
A child will always eat exactly what she has loved for the past year unless it is the only food in the fridge.
The ease with which a toddler acquires the ability to say a word increases with its likelihood to embarrass a sailor.
From time to time there are people who just do stuff that is simply unbelievable not only from the stand point of what they did, but also in response to the question of why on earth they would do it. (In the beginning a few people thought exactly that way of my wife for marrying me. Today that number has increased.)
Anyway, it's not like she did something totally crazy like Les Stewart. Les manually typed out each number between one and a million on a typewriter. I don't know what brand of typewriter he used, but as you can read below he wore out 7 of them.
I wonder if he ever tried to get a corporate sponsor. He seems like just the guy that Smith-Corona, IBM, or Toshiba would give a Porche to drive around when he went out for a new ribbon.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
