Entertainment

The tech support problem dates back to long before the industrial revolution, when primitive tribesmen beat out a rhythm on drums to communicate:

This "Fire Help." Me Groog.

Me Lorto. Help. Fire not work.

You have flint and stone?

Ugh.

You hit them together?

Ugh.

What happen?

Fire not work.

(sigh) Make spark?

No spark, no fire, me confused. Fire work yesterday.

*sigh* You change rock?

I change nothing.

You sure?

Me make one change. Stone hot so me soak in stream so stone not burn Lorto hand. Small change, shouldn't keep Lorto from make fire.

*Grabs club and goes to Lorto's cave*

Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the buds on my father's young peach tree for two years in a row. This spring, Dad was ready. He replanted the sapling in a large box, mounted it on wheels, and put the tree in the garage whenever the temperature dropped.

One warm April day, Dad was wheeling the tree out into the yard, and he stopped to give our dog a drink from the garden hose. A neighbor watched the scene with amusement. "Frank," he finally commented, "you're the only man I know who walks his tree and waters his dog!"

Here is another reason to be a fireman - making cars fly.

It's also another reason to not have a barn fire on a lazy Saturday afternoon in Sheepjaw, New Mexico.  Victor Aerbos was admittedly disappointed by the local fire department's slow response to put out the fire that erupted in his main cattle barn. But when he he overheard two of the late responders still laughing about the "cool flying fire hose car" and then made further inquiries, he got down right angry.

With a little help from his ex-wife, who is employed as a dispatcher with the SFD and currently going through another divorce with the Fire Chief, Ted Beauwing,  Mr. Aerbos obtained a copy of the fire hose car video and sued for damages, claiming the department's use of all available fire hoses to make the automobile fly amounted to negligent abandonment of duty.

However, after Judge Karen McDonnell-Douglas of New Mexico District Court's 8th Precinct (DC8) heard the case, she accepted the defense's argument that the fire deptartment was merely testing new methods to extract accident victims from underneath cars.  Aerbos is expected to appeal the case against Beauwing.

One more thing - I made this whole story up.  It seemed so much more interesting than just saying,  "Here's a cool video of fire hoses making a car fly."

I had just pulled into a parking spot at the home improvement store when smoke and flames began pouring from under my hood. Frantic, I bolted into the store and ran up to the first clerk I saw. As luck would have it, he was standing behind the customer service counter.

"Please help," I gasped. "My car's on fire! I need a fire extinguisher!"

Without even looking up, he replied, "Aisle 12."