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Entertainment

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4899 - March 24, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone.

more zoetropesI am many months into my new habit of tidying up my desk and putting everything away each night. I am so enjoying the extra energy that comes from not having the distraction of clutter when I start each day and am working throughout it! If you thought you would try doing the same (after I mentioned it the last time) but haven't yet - don't give up because it is well worth it!

Today's video share is another one about Zoetropes. This Zoetropes Artist is taking them to a whole new level!
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 



Men, Dogs, Women

couple walking 11.  How Dogs and Men Are the Same

Both take up too much space on the bed.
Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
Both are threatened by their own kind.
Both are bad at asking you questions.
Neither tells you what's bothering them.
The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
Neither does any dishes.
Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.
Neither understands what you see in cats.

2.  How Dogs Are Better Than Men

Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
Dogs miss you when you're gone.
Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
Dogs don't criticize your friends.
Dogs admit when they're jealous.
Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out.
Dogs do not play games with you-except fetch (and they never laugh at how you throw).
Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
You can train a dog.
Dogs are easy to buy for.
Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.
Dogs admit it when they're lost.
Dogs are colour-blind.
Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

3.  Where Dogs Fall Down

Men only have two feet that track in mud.
Men can buy you presents.
Men don't have to play with every man they see when you take them around the block.
Dogs have dog breath all the time.
Men don't shed as much, and if they do, they hide it.

4.  Why Dogs are Better than Women

Dogs don't ask what are you thinking.
Dogs love it when your friends come over.
Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.
Dogs think you sing great.
A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
Dogs love red meat.
Dogs don't shop.
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
Dogs love long car trips.
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Dogs understand that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.



One-Liner #1819

man thinking 5“I worry about ridiculous things, you know, like how does a guy who drives a snowplow get to work in the morning… that can keep me awake for days.” 

- Billy Connolly



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Color Dreams

colors 2When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.



Quote #2254

palm sunday"But everyone who lined the streets had a different reason for waving those palms. Some were political activists; they’d heard Jesus had supernatural power, and they wanted him to use it to free Israel from Roman rule. Others had loved ones who were sick or dying. They waved branches, hoping for physical healing. Some were onlookers merely looking for something to do, while others were genuine followers who wished Jesus would establish himself as an earthly king. Jesus was the only one in the parade who knew why he was going to Jerusalem – to die.

He had a mission, while everyone else had an agenda."

- Bill Hybels



Christian Living

child boy beachLittle Rodney, 4 years old, walked down the beach, and as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand. He walked up to her and asked, "Are you a Christian?"

"Yes." she replied.

"Do you read your Bible every day?"

She nodded her head, "Yes."

"Do you pray often?" the boy asked next, and again she answered, "Yes."

With that he asked his final question, "Will you hold my quarter while I go swimming?"


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Ice Cream Solves a Lot of My Problems

ice cream articleLike everybody else, I face problems almost every day. Or maybe I should say, my problem faces me.

Every Monday, when I get up, I say to myself, “How many problems will I have this week? How many will I solve?” Unfortunately, myself never replies back.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

One-Liner #1819

man thinking 5“I worry about ridiculous things, you know, like how does a guy who drives a snowplow get to work in the morning… that can keep me awake for days.” 

- Billy Connolly

  • One-liners
  • Sleep One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Winter Jokes
  • Worry Quotes

Men, Dogs, Women

couple walking 11.  How Dogs and Men Are the Same

Both take up too much space on the bed.
Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
Both are threatened by their own kind.
Both are bad at asking you questions.
Neither tells you what's bothering them.
The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
Neither does any dishes.
Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.
Neither understands what you see in cats.

2.  How Dogs Are Better Than Men

  • Clean Jokes
  • Marriage Jokes
  • Dog Jokes
  • Pet Jokes
  • Relationship Jokes

Read more: Men, Dogs, Women

Color Dreams

colors 2When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.

  • Clean Puns
  • Sleep Jokes
  • Sleep Puns

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4898 - March 21, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday - and welcome to spring or autumn, depending on your hemisphere!

mushroom plays deadCalm has returned to Cybersalt World Headquarters following a two night, March break sleepover by two of our grandkids. A 9 and 5 year-old's celebration and testing of the relaxed rules of Grandma and Grandpa Cybersalt's house sure kept us on the go!

Today's video share shows that playing dead is sometimes the best strategy - especially if you can smell like you are dead too!
You can watch the video here.

 Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 



W-a-i-t-i-n-g

girl glassesThe two ladies were sitting in the living room, waiting for their hostess, who was slightly delayed. The daughter of the family was with them, on the theory that she would keep the visitors occupied during the wait.

The child was about six years old, snub nosed, freckled, buck toothed and bespectacled. She maintained a deep silence and the two ladies peered doubtfully at her.

Finally, one of them muttered to the other, "Not very p-r-e-t-t-y, I fear," carefully spelling the key word.

Whereupon the child piped up, "But awful s-m-a-r-t."



One-Liners #1818

child bedIt seems unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed that don't want to go to bed.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Cemetery Workers

cemetery night"Cemetery workers always work the graveyard."



Quote #2253

ocean 3"A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor."

- Franklin D. Roosevelt



The More

hands holding 3The more generous we are,
the more joyous we become.

The more cooperative we are,
the more valuable we become.

The more enthusiastic we are,
the more productive we become.

The more serving we are,
the more prosperous we become.

The more outgoing we are,
the more helpful we become.

The more curious we are,
the more creative we become.

The more patient we are,
the more understanding we become.

The more persistent we are,
the more successful we become.

- William Arthur Ward


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Susan Page writes . . . . 

His Watermark

Heron- photo by Susan PageI love nature photography. It is a hobby that I am quite passionate about, one which I never tire of. When I’m outdoors with my camera I lose all track of time and am in my “happy place,” like when I spend hours photographing the herons on the pond near my home.

I do not have professional equipment or an editing program that I’ve invested in. Maybe in time that will become a possibility, but for now, I’m content.

While researching how to put a watermark on a photo, I became fascinated by how many photography terms can draw a parallel to our spiritual walk.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

  1. Cemetery Workers
  2. W-a-i-t-i-n-g
  3. One-liner #1818
  4. Dr. Geezer's Hilarious Clinic: A Prescription for Laughter!

Subcategories

Clean Jokes Article Count:  3626

Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you?  Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4783
 

  

Christmas Jokes Article Count:  77

a picture of christmas ballsWe think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

Your Turn to Be Funny Article Count:  3

It's your turn to be funny.  Submit your funny caption today.

Funny Elephant Pictures Article Count:  16

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures?  You've come to the right place!

Cybersalt Digest Archive Article Count:  1572

Games Article Count:  15

Here are the games we have on the site so far.  There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Funny Pictures Article Count:  679

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow.  We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often.  Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

Funny Car Pictures Article Count:  169

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Funny Cat Pictures Article Count:  231

catmelonhead150x127.jpgOver the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

  

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4783

 

 

 

Funny Dog Pictures Article Count:  149

dog_maggie.jpgSome say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Funny Horse Pictures Article Count:  24

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

Funny Christmas Pictures Article Count:  53

christmas cakeWe think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Pearly Gates Jokes Article Count:  544

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes.  Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

FunBlog Article Count:  533

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here.  If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

Cartoons Article Count:  3119

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Backpew Article Count:  2944

Clean Puns Article Count:  2012

Our collection of puns.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4783

 

Funny Signs Article Count:  167

Our collection of funny signs.

One-liners Article Count:  2066

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

Chicken Humor Article Count:  1

Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart! 

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