~ It is well documented that for every mile that you jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.
~ My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now and we don't know where on earth she is!
~ The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
First man: "I hear the First National Bank is looking for a new teller."
Second man: "I thought they just hired a new teller last week."
First man: "Right. That's the one they're looking for."
One Christmas, a parent decreed that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties.
As a result their grandmother never received acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given.
The next year things were different, however.
Click here to view this edition online!
Oh look, the last Chicken Thursday of 2023!
Grandma Cybersalt's and my Christmas experienced some last minute changes when our granddaughter tested positive for COVID on Christmas Eve. That resulted in us going nowhere on Christmas morning to open presents. Instead we slept in, had Susan's sister over for a visit and then the three of us enjoyed a wonderful turkey dinner that I picked up from the main gathering of family and friends who were already infected or exposed!
Today's video share is of a recent world record drone show. They tried for 1,500 drones, and pulled it off with 1,499. If you watch closely you can catch glimpses of the one drone that didn't want to play!"
Click here to watch the video
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
~ Pastor Tim
One Christmas, a parent decreed that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties.
As a result their grandmother never received acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given.
The next year things were different, however.
"The children came over in person to thank me," the grandmother told a friend triumphantly.
"How wonderful!" the friend exclaimed. "What do you think caused the change in behavior?"
"Oh, that's easy," the grandmother replied. "This year I didn't sign the checks"
Just checked that the carton of milk in my fridge expired December 31; unlike me, it had a date on New Year’s Eve.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
First man: "I hear the First National Bank is looking for a new teller."
Second man: "I thought they just hired a new teller last week."
First man: "Right. That's the one they're looking for."
"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream."
- C.S. Lewis
Afrikaans - Geseënde kersfees en voorspoedige nuwe jaar
Apache (Western) - Gozhqq Keshmish
Arabic - I'D Miilad Said ous Sana Saida
Croatian - Sretan Bozic
Danish - Glædelig Jul oggodt nytår
Farsi - Sal-e no mubarak
French - Joyeux Noël et Bonne Année!
German - Fröhliche Weihnachten und ein glückliches Neues Jahr!
Greek - Kala Christougenna Ki'eftihismenos O Kenourios Chronos
Hawaiian - Mele Kalikimaka & Hauoli Makahiki Hou
Hebrew - Mo'adim Lesimkha. Shanah Tova
Hindi - Shubh Naya Baras
Iraqi - Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah
Irish - Nollaig Shona Dhuit
Iroquois - Ojenyunyat Sungwiyadeson homungradon nagwutut & Ojenyunyat osrasay
Italian - Buon Natale e Felice Anno Nuovo
Japanese - Shinnen omedeto. Kurisumasu Omedeto
Korean - Sung Tan Chuk Ha Kyrghyz - JangI jIlIngIz guttuu bolsun!
Latin - Pax hominibus bonae voluntatis
Maori - Kia orana e kia manuia rava i teia Kiritimeti e te Mataiti Ou
Mongolian - Zul saryn bolon shine ony mend devshuulye
Nepali - krist Yesu Ko Shuva Janma Utsav Ko Upalaxhma Hardik Shuva & Naya Barsa Ko harkik Shuvakamana
Norweigan/Nynorsk - Eg ynskjer hermed Dykk alle ein God Jul og Godt Nyttår
Polish - Wesolych Swiat i Szczesliwego Nowego Roku.
Portuguese - Boas Festas e um feliz Ano Novo
Romanian - Craciun fericit si un An Nou fericit!
Russian - Pozdrevlyayu s prazdnikom Rozhdestva i s Novim Godom
Samoan - Ia manuia le Kilisimasi ma le tausaga fou
Slovenian - Vesel božič, srečno novo leto
Somali - ciid wanaagsan iyo sanad cusub oo fiican.
Spanish - Feliz Navidad y Próspero Año Nuevo
Sudanese - Wilujeng Natal Sareng Warsa Enggal
Swedish - God Jul och Gott Nytt à r
Tagalog - Maligayang Pasko at Manigong Bagong Taon
Tahitian - Ia ora i te Noere e ia ora na i te matahiti 'api
Thai - Suksan Wan Christmas lae Sawadee Pee Mai
Ukrainian - Veseloho Vam Rizdva i Shchastlyvoho Novoho Roku!
Vietnamese - Chuc Mung Giang
Welsh - Nadolig llawen a blwyddyn newydd dda
Sinh - Chuc Mung Tan Nien
Zulu - Sinifesela Ukhisimusi Omuhle Nonyaka Omusha Onempumelelo
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
It doesn't seem possible another Christmas has come and gone. They come and go so fast that I'm not sure I can keep up with all of this. Every year, our family has more people, which is never bad.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
Just checked that the carton of milk in my fridge expired December 31; unlike me, it had a date on New Year’s Eve.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
