Cybersalt News

Mrs. Cybersalt and I are sharing a monitor (the computer type - not the lizard) at Cybersalt World Headquarters today. What I hoped to be a highly productive and efficient yesterday quickly descended to a slow grind as my main monitor finally packed it in after months of only being able to turn it on if let it warm up first and then manually unplugged and replugged the power cable.  The fact that I had to do this while standing in a tub of water let me know it wouldn't last forever.

Today's feature funny page on the Cybersalt site is "Orangutan in a Pail."  You'll find it at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/orangutan-in-a-pail

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

Computer Problem Report Form

COMPUTER PROBLEM REPORT FORM:

1. Describe your problem:

__________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

2. Now, describe the problem accurately:

__________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:

__________________________________________________

___________________________________________________

4. Problem severity:

A. Minor
B. Minor
C. Minor
D. Trivial

5. Nature of the problem:

A. ___Locked Up
B. ___Frozen
C. ___Hung
D. ___Strange Smell

6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes __ No __

7. Is it turned on? Yes __ No __

8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes __ No __

9. Have you made it worse? Yes __

10. Have you had a friend who "knows all about computers " try to fix it for you? Yes__ No__

11. Did they make it even worse? Yes __

12. Have you read the manual? Yes__ No__

13. Are you sure you've read the manual? Maybe __ No__

14. Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? No__

15. If you read the manual, do you think you understood it? Yes__ No__

16. If 'Yes' then explain why you can't fix the problem yourself:

__________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

17. What were you doing with your computer when the problem occurred?

__________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

18. If you answered 'nothing' then explain why you were logged in:

___________________________________________________

__________________________________________________

19. Are you sure that you aren't imagining the problem? Yes__ No__

20. Does the clock on your VCR blink 12:00? Yes__ What's a VCR__

21. Do you have a copy of 'PCs for Dummies'? Yes__ No__

22. Do you have any independent witnesses to the problem? Yes__ No__

23. Do you have any electronic products that DO work? Yes __ No__

24. Is there anyone else that you could blame this problem on? Yes__ No__

25. Have you given the machine a good whack on the top? Yes__ No__ http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001

26. Is the machine on fire? Yes__ Not Yet __

One-liner #0724

"I was good at math before they decided to mix the alphabet in it."

Snapdragon Part of life

I have entered the snapdragon part of life.

Part of me has snapped and the rest is draggin'.

Quote #1176

"Mercy often wears the face of forgiveness. And though it usually isn't an enemy in uniform that we are challenged to forgive, we have opportunities for mercy everyday. Family members and friends, co-workers and neighbors and even strangers have need for our forgiveness."

Other's Welfare

Two brothers worked together on the family farm.  One was married and had a large family.  The other was single.  At the day's end, the brothers shared everything equally, produce and profit.

Then one day the single brother said to himself, "It's not right that we should share equally the produce and the profit.  I'm alone and my needs are simple." So each night he took a sack of grain from his bin and crept across the field between their houses, dumping it into his brother's bin.

Meanwhile, the married brother said to himself, "It's not right that we should share the produce and the profit equally.  After all, I'm married and I have my wife and my children to look after me in years to come.  My brother has no one, and no one to take care of his future." So each night he took a sack of grain and dumped it into his single brother's bin.

Both men were puzzled for years because their supply of grain never dwindled.  Then one dark night the two brothers bumped into each other. Slowly it dawned on them what was happening.

They dropped their sacks and embraced one another.