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Entertainment

Tech Support Fun

computer oldTech support has been needed since the very beginning. Enjoy these reminders of yesteryear, back when people had their first personal computers.

+++A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
The tech asked her if she was "running it under Windows."
The woman then responded, "No, my desk is next to the door.  But that is a good point.  The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine."

+++ Tech Support: "How much free space do you have on your hard drive?"
Customer: "Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?"

  • Clean Jokes
  • Computer Jokes
  • Tech Support Jokes
  • Tech Jokes
  • Jokes from Yesteryear

Read more: Tech Support Fun

Boyfriend

woman surprisedShe had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but she broke it off.

  • Clean Puns
  • Boyfriend Jokes
  • Relationship Puns

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4902 - April 7, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone!

I just realized that every Sunday mailing this year has gone out with 2023 in the title. I am very disappointed in you, Raul el Perro!

nascar pov crashesThere was no mailing last Chicken Thursday as I was pretty preoccupied catching up on work after moving a client's web sites (totaling about 600 gigabytes in size) from their old server to my company. On top of that last week marked the completion of updating another company server that the Cybersalt Site is hosted on. Boy, was (and is) my brain tired from all that technical work! Later today I will definitely be enjoying some downtime when I go out for Pokemon Community Day with my daughter and son-in-law!

Today's video share is a collection of POV Videos of NASCAR Crashes. Come to think of it, they kind of remind me of what it its like in my brain lately while I try to keep up at work!
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 



Addicted to Thinking

man thinking 5It started out innocently enough.  I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up.  Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone - "to relax," I told myself - but I knew it wasn't true.

Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.  I began to think on the job.  I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka.  I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

Things weren't going so great at home either.  One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life.  She spent that night at her mother's.

I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker.  One day the boss called me in.  He said, "I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem.  If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."

This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss.  "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."

"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"

"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."

"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver.

"You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began to cry.

I'd had enough.  "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door. 

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche.  I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors...  they didn't open. 

The library was closed.  As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye.  "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.  You probably recognize that line.  It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.

Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.  I never miss a TA meeting.

At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's."

Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.  I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home.
Life just seemed...  easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.



One-Liner #1822

fishing boatIf you're ugly and sad, buy a fishing boat and just be ugly.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Contest

mallThere once was a sweepstakes that offered a shopping center as first prize.

The Supreme Court, however, ruled the contest illegal, since everyone knows you can't win a mall.



Quote #2257

prayer4"The most important Christians are not the ones who preach great sermons and write great books, but the ones who pray, and pray, and pray some more, sharing the quiet but effective victory of Jesus over all that defaces God's creation."

- John Piper, Lent for Everyone



Retirement

german shepherdMy partner and I pulled our police cruiser up behind a car stopped on the shoulder of the highway. We got out and asked the driver if we could help.

No, he replied, there was no trouble; he had just stopped to look at a map.

When we turned back, we noticed that his German shepherd had jumped in the open passenger-side front window of our car.

"You may think there's no trouble," I smiled, "but your dog obviously thinks he's done something wrong. He's in our patrol car."

He laughed. "He probably thinks you've come to take him to work," he replied. "He's a retired police dog."


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Why Does Monday Have To Follow Sunday?

mondayThe older I get, the more I wake up not knowing what day it is. That is particularly true on Mondays.

My favorite day of the week is Sunday. I enjoy attending church, fellowshipping with other Christians, and, of course, the Sunday worship services. I enjoy Sunday morning and evening like no other time of the week.

Since I became a Christian about 65 years ago, I have only missed a Sunday service when I was sick or had some emergency. Sunday is the most important day of the week for me, and it has been for years. I don’t see it changing anytime soon.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Addicted to Thinking

man thinking 5It started out innocently enough.  I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up.  Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone - "to relax," I told myself - but I knew it wasn't true.

Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.  I began to think on the job.  I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka.  I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

  • Clean Jokes
  • Sickness Jokes
  • Husband Jokes
  • Quitting Jokes

Read more: Addicted to Thinking

Contest

mallThere once was a sweepstakes that offered a shopping center as first prize.

The Supreme Court, however, ruled the contest illegal, since everyone knows you can't win a mall.

  • Clean Puns
  • Shopping Puns
  • Court Jokes
  • Mall Jokes
  • Lottery Jokes
  1. One-Liner #1822
  2. The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4901 - March 31, 2024
  3. Missionary Mimicking
  4. Confiscation 1

Subcategories

Clean Jokes Article Count:  3626

Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you?  Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4641
 

  

Christmas Jokes Article Count:  77

a picture of christmas ballsWe think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

Your Turn to Be Funny Article Count:  3

It's your turn to be funny.  Submit your funny caption today.

Funny Elephant Pictures Article Count:  16

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures?  You've come to the right place!

Cybersalt Digest Archive Article Count:  1559

Games Article Count:  15

Here are the games we have on the site so far.  There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Funny Pictures Article Count:  679

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow.  We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often.  Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

Funny Car Pictures Article Count:  169

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Funny Cat Pictures Article Count:  231

catmelonhead150x127.jpgOver the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

  

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4641

 

 

 

Funny Dog Pictures Article Count:  149

dog_maggie.jpgSome say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Funny Horse Pictures Article Count:  24

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

Funny Christmas Pictures Article Count:  53

christmas cakeWe think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Pearly Gates Jokes Article Count:  544

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes.  Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

FunBlog Article Count:  533

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here.  If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

Cartoons Article Count:  3119

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Backpew Article Count:  2944

Clean Puns Article Count:  1986

Our collection of puns.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4641

 

Funny Signs Article Count:  167

Our collection of funny signs.

One-liners Article Count:  2044

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

Chicken Humor Article Count:  1

Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart! 

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