Hey Walmart, don't get angry at me if I forget to scan something; you literally gave me zero training before making me a cashier.
Click here to view this edition online!
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
Today is a fun day at Cybersalt World Headquarters as Grandma Cybersalt and I attend (virtually) JDAYUSA. Last year we attended in person in Austin, Texas, but this year we are home watching what is going on in Nashville, TN. Susan is taking an all day course in building websites with Joomla 5, and I will be taking in the general sessions. Tomorrow I will be moderating another "Smarter Than Tim" session, interviewing two people who know their stuff better than me (There are a lot of people in the world qualified to be in the session, lol.
Today's video share shows a talented musician who improvises a song on the spot. I'm not making it up - but she is!
You can watch the video here.
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
~ Pastor Tim
Tech support has been needed since the very beginning. Enjoy these reminders of yesteryear, back when people had their first personal computers.
+++A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
The tech asked her if she was "running it under Windows."
The woman then responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine."
+++ Tech Support: "How much free space do you have on your hard drive?"
Customer: "Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?"
+++ Overheard in a computer shop:
Customer: "I'd like a mouse mat, please."
Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety."
Customer: "But will they be compatible with my computer?"
+++ Customer: "Can you copy the Internet for me on this diskette?"
+++ Customer: "So that'll get me connected to the Internet, right?"
Tech Support: "Yeah."
Customer: "And that's the latest version of the Internet, right?"
Tech Support: "Uhh...uh...uh...yeah."
+++ Customer: "My computer crashed!"
Tech Support: "It crashed?"
Customer: "Yeah, it won't let me play my game."
Tech Support: "Alright, hit Control-Alt-Delete to reboot."
Customer: "No, it didn't crash -- it crashed."
Tech Support: "Huh?"
Customer: "I crashed my game. That's what I said before. Now it doesn't work."
Turned out, the user was playing Lunar Lander and crashed his spaceship.
Tech Support: "Click on 'File,' then 'New Game.'"
Customer: [pause] "Wow! How'd you learn how to do that?"
When people tell me, "You're gonna regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but she broke it off.
"I believe in Christ, like I believe in the sun - not because I can see it, but by it I can see everything else."
- C. S. Lewis
A wife one evening drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple, how devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?"
"I don't know her well enough."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Susan Page writes . . . .
- photo by Susan PageThe word “good” is used a lot in our day-to-day conversation. We might say, “have a good day” or “good-night” or “have a good time” or “good-bye.” There are slang expressions like “good grief”, or “good riddance” and goodness knows how many other phrases we could refer to.
From the opening pages of Scripture, we see that when God saw or took pleasure in His creation, He voiced His approval, with the words … “It is good.” The first reference is at the very beginning of Creation, “And God saw that the light was good. And God separated the light from the darkness” (Genesis 1:4). Most of us can relate to the fact that we would prefer to be in the light. Just think back to those times in childhood when we let the fear of the dark overtake our imaginations. Yes, light is a very good thing.
God made the land and the sea and said that it was good. While I have never been able to travel the world, I will always remember my trip through the magnificent Canadian Rockies while riding in the back of a Mustang convertible. I would certainly agree with my Majestic Maker of heaven and earth, … oh, my, it is so good!
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
When people tell me, "You're gonna regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver.
A woman was having a medical problem - her husband snoring.
So she called the doctor one morning, and asked him if there was anything he could do to relieve her "suffering."
Read more: Snoring Cure: A Pricey Operation or New Sports Car? 🤣
Tech support has been needed since the very beginning. Enjoy these reminders of yesteryear, back when people had their first personal computers.
+++A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
The tech asked her if she was "running it under Windows."
The woman then responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine."
+++ Tech Support: "How much free space do you have on your hard drive?"
Customer: "Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?"
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
