One way to find out if you're old is to fall down in front of a group of people. I they laugh, you're young; if they panic, you're old.
There was a woman who spent some months serving God in Kenya. On her final visit to a remote township she attended a medical clinic. As the Maasai women there began to sing together, she found herself deeply moved by their hauntingly beautiful harmonies.
She wanted to always remember so she recorded this moment and would share it with friends when she arrived home. With tears flowing down her cheeks, she turned to her friend and asked, "Can you please tell me the translation of the words to this song?"
Her friend looked at her and solemnly replied, "If you boil the water, you won't get dysentery."
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Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
Congratulations to our eldest grandson on his graduation from elementary school. Wow, grandkids are real reminders that I am older than I feel.
I can't remember if I have l already shared a video similar to today's, but I found this one very satisfying so I will risk the repeat. I also find it fascinating that the fellow in this video still has all of his fingers!
Click Here to Watch.
Enjoy the rest of today's digest!
~ Pastor Tim
Take OneA pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!"
The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!"
The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him."
"Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"
The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind fire-fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime."
The group was silent for a moment.
The pastor said, "That's so sad. I will say a special prayer for them tonight."
The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."
The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"
What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers?
Mechanical Engineers build weapons; Civil Engineers build targets.
At my funeral, I would like there to be a piñata so people can be happy ... but filled with bees so they're not too happy.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
To the person who stole my camouflage jacket and my flip-flops ... you can hide, but you can't run!
"In our eagerness to make converts, we are under constant temptation to hide from our hearers the fact that the Christian life is not a pleasurable religious game, but a life of repentance, self-crucifixion, humiliation, and rejection."
-A. W. Tozer
Some people try to punish themselves for their sins. They do not stand on the promises of forgiveness and Christ's propitiation.
"Many years ago, a father and his daughter were walking through the grass on the Canadian prairie. In the distance, they saw a prairie fire, and they realized that it would soon engulf them.
The father knew there was only one way of escape: They would quickly begin a fire right where they were and burn a large patch of grass. When the huge fire drew near, they then would stand on the section that had already burned.
When the flames did approach them, the girl was terrified but her father assured her, 'The flames can't get to us. We are standing where the fire has already been.'"
- Erwin Lutzer, Failure, The Back Door to Success
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Susan Page writes . . . .
- photo from Susan PageNaming our children is serious business, especially if we are Christ followers. When God added two beautiful gifts to our family, I pondered and prayed over the decision of what their names would be. There was no problem landing on their first names; it was their second names I went back and forth on, ultimately landing on Christina Joy, followed by Jennifer Dawn.
You may be wondering what this introduction has to do with the title of this devotional. Hang in there while I explain.
I have been known to have a slight to moderate issue with what is sometimes referred to as OCD. I believe there is a place for everything, and everything has its place. Over the years, I’ve become less of a fusspot, but others might disagree with my humble assessment.
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
I think I'll tell my kids that the Titanic sunk because Jack and Rose had sex before marriage.
To the person who stole my camouflage jacket and my flip-flops ... you can hide, but you can't run!
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
