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September 2020
Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of
56
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Pastor Tim (35)
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Search
30 Sep
Quotes
Susan Davis
769
Quote #1949
"To have courage for whatever comes in life - everything lies in that." - Teresa of Ávila
read more..
30 Sep
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3490
Knitting Chinese
Many years ago my wife was to knitting what Tiger Woods is to golf. She designed exotic patterns with ease. There was an occasion when we had lunch in an authentic Chinese restaurant (only one person
...
read more..
30 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2464
Gathering Nuts?
Should vegetarians attend meetings?
...
read more..
30 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1774
Answering Machine Callbacks
Back in the day, I purchased a telephone-answering machine with a prerecorded message that used a male voice. When my mother returned from vacation, I forgot to mention it to her. The next Saturday,
...
read more..
30 Sep
One-liners
Susan Davis
740
One-Liner #1511
Self-annihilating Description From here on down, it's uphill all the way.
...
read more..
27 Sep
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
907
Oh, to Be Crazy and Get Paid for It
I usually don't complain a lot. When I do I get caught in some dilemma that I can’t talk my way out. You think I would learn my lesson, but I'm still in the learning curve. It was a long week, and th
...
read more..
27 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
657
Cybersalt News - September 27, 2020
Sunday greetings everyone! This week the premier of our province called a snap election for October 24th - you know because nothing else big is going on right now, lol. But seriously, what a grind w
...
read more..
26 Sep
Quotes
Susan Davis
764
Quote #1948
"If you want everyone to like you, don't be a pastor. Go sell ice-cream." - Dr. E. I. Stetzer
read more..
26 Sep
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3076
Change Reply
Corporal Conroy needed to use a pay phone, but didn't have change for a dollar. He saw Private Duncan mopping the base's corridor floors, and asked him, "Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?" Pr
...
read more..
26 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2300
Post Majority
A letter carrier's career is a mail-dominated profession.
...
read more..
26 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1773
Potty Training, Parenting, Embarassment
My three year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training, and I was on him constantly about it. One day, we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch between errands. It was very busy, with a ful
...
read more..
26 Sep
One-liners
Susan Davis
749
One-Liner #1510
Self-annihilating Command Men, women, and children first.
...
read more..
24 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
611
Cybersalt News - September 24, 2020
Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Welcome to autumn in the Northern Hemisphere and spring in the Southern. I am sure you "Southerners" are excited to get back outdoors after a long winter inside. Here at C
...
read more..
23 Sep
Quotes
Susan Davis
803
Quote #1947
"Whatever your heart clings to and confides in, that is really your god." - Martin Luther
read more..
23 Sep
Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
2894
Children
Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle:"Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children." You spend the first 2 years of their
read more..
23 Sep
Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
2980
Hockey Injury
Andy came to work one day, limping something awful. One of his co-workers, Josh, noticed and asked Andy what happened. Andy replied, "Oh, nothing. It's just an old hockey injury that acts up once in
...
read more..
23 Sep
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
8901
Get Well Soon
A motorcycle cop was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on hi
...
read more..
23 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2268
Vegetable Warning
Notice! Take lettuce from top of stack, or heads will roll!
...
read more..
23 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1853
Complaints
"Well, I reckon you've been a pretty good horse," said the farmer. "You work hard and I ain't had to call the vet on you much. I only wish you pulled the plow a little faster." "NO!" said the horse,
read more..
23 Sep
One-liners
Susan Davis
754
One-Liner #1509
Self-annihilating Command Authorized parking is forbidden!
...
read more..
20 Sep
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
4640
'Pastor, Pastor ...' What Do Adults Really Do?
I love children. I love being around them and watching them play. Each Sunday, following morning worship service, I delight in handing out little bags of jellybeans to all the children. Just between
...
read more..
20 Sep
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
861
Getting Away With It Is Half the Fun
I must admit I don't get away with very much, and I never have. It's not that I never try. It's just that whenever I try to get away with something, it always backfires. I wish there were a class som
...
read more..
20 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
726
Cybersalt News - September 20, 2020
Sunday greetings everyone! Today's video share is an example of how the perspective from which you look at something can really change your . . . . . . perspective on it. Above water, Flamingos are
...
read more..
19 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
626
Legalism
The Game Warden stopped a deer hunter and asked to see his hunting license. "This is last year's license," the warden informed him. "I know," said the hunter, "but I shouldn't need a new license. I
...
read more..
19 Sep
Quotes
Susan Davis
798
Quote #1946
"Art is one thing that can go on mattering once it has stopped hurting." - Elizabeth Bowen
read more..
19 Sep
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
7946
Lost Ticket
Albert Einstein was also recognized as the original absent-minded professor. One day, on board a train, he was unable to find his ticket. The conductor said, "Take it easy. You'll find it." When the
...
read more..
19 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2124
Midday to You
I had just moved to an address between Sunrise Ave. and Sunset Blvd., one of Sacramento's major streets, and was explaining to a clerk where my home was located for billing purposes. "I live between
...
read more..
19 Sep
One-liners
Susan Davis
696
One-Liner #1508
Self-annihilating Command Ignore this sign!
...
read more..
17 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
632
Cybersalt News - September 17, 2020
Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Today, for the first time in over 6 months, I had a business lunch with one of my clients. We met up at the local Denny's. Arriving at the parking lot, I put my mask on to
...
read more..
16 Sep
Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
2848
Make a Wish
Visiting St Patrick's Cathedral on a tour of New York City, my daughter and her children were awed by the sight. The kids were especially curious about the votive candles, so my daughter asked if the
...
read more..
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