Monthly Archive

October 2008

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 28 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4591

Committee Praise

The new pastor was winding down the service. In the back of the church, the fellowship committee stood to go to the church hall and prepare snacks for the congregation. Seeing them rise, Pastor Mike, ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4868

Computer One-liners - Part 3

Computer One-liners - Part 3Programming Department: Mistakes made while you wait.Programming is an art form that fights back.RAM disk is not an installation procedure.Real programs don't eat cache.Rem... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4518

Sick Call

Mr. Frobisher constantly called Dr. Wilson at all hours of the day and night and would then keep him on the phone with a litany of imagined ailments.   Finally the doctor could take it no longer. "Lis... read more..

Misc
Paul Wayne Foltz DD
3287

Rough Times are Coming....

Not only is a financial crisis looming over our Country, but times of persecution are coming for Christians. If the fairness doctrine is reinstated all christian programs will be removed from the TV, ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4736

Computer One-liners - Part 2

Computer One-liners - Part 2ISDN: I Still Don't kNowISDN: Idiot Services you Don't NeedIt said, "Insert disk #3," but only two will fit!Klingon prompt: strike any user when ready.Manual Writer's Creed... read more..

Sermons
Pastor Tim
2503

Safe Asleep

Jesus is taking care of - and will take care of - those who trust in Him and die before He comes again. {audio}podcast/sm20081019.mp3{/audio}... read more..

Totally Tim
Pastor Tim
4334

Finding Longitude and Latitude on Google Maps

GoogleMaps is great for looking up the location of places, but if you want to know the longitude and latitude of the place you are looking for, there is no obvious way to gather that info. However, t... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5112

Politcal Quotes

"I resent your insinuendoes." "If we don't make some changes, the status quo will remain the same." "We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world." "If Lincoln were alive today, read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4502

Pants Dilemma

A young man came home from the office and found his bride sobbing convulsively. "I feel terrible," she told him. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.""Forget... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5295

Late Arrival

A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 8:30!"He replies: "Why? What happened at 8:30?"... read more..

Thanksgiving
Pastor Tim
2968

Be Thankful for Little

When you have little to be thankful for, be thankful for little.   Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20081012.mp3{/audio}... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4662

Cake Question

While working at Baskin-Robbins, I helped a woman, who was full of questions about the flavors and types available, pick out an ice-cream cake.As I was boxing it up for her, she had one last question:... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
13527

Computer One-liners - Part 1

Computer One-liners - Part 1Hard Disk space: the final frontier!Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY?H lp! S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5364

Mr. Scwartz

Mr. Schwartz was the oldest of 7 children, so he had to quit school and work to help support his younger brothers and sisters. He never learned to read, so when he married and started a checking accou... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
5377

This Little Piggy-Bank Went to Market

In our house, we have a saying. "A penny saved is a borderline miracle." Like most people, we find it very difficult to save when it comes to money. We have in the dark recesses of our back bedroom cl... read more..

Sermons
Pastor Tim
2590

Press On

Keep pressing on with the things God has made you good at. {audio}podcast/sm20081005.mp3{/audio} ... read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1468

Good SeptemberMorning 9-26-08

"If you love them which love you, what reward have you? Do not even the publicans the same?"       The test of love is not in loving our friends as that would b read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1495

Good September Morning 28-08

TWENTIETH SUNDAY AFTER PENTECOST This is the day the LORD hath made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.   Isa. 5:1-7 also Num. 27:12-23 Phil. 3:12-21 Matthew 21:33-43 Psalm 81:1-10  &nbs... read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1444

Good September Morning 9-27-08

"Are not Abana and Pharpar, rivers of Damascus, better than all the waters of Israel? May I not wash in them and be clean?" 2 Kings 5:12       Naaman, the Syria read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1440

Good September Morning 9-29-08

"What thinkest Thou? Is it lawful to give tribute to Caesar or not? Matthew 22:15-22       The Pharisees hated Jesus because His teaching of forgiveness by grace was read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1494

Good September Morning 9-30-08

"How can a man be born when he is old?" John 3:1-17       Nicodemus was one of the few Pharisees to be attracted by Jesus' teachings and miracles. During an ear read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1588

Good Oct. Morning 10-1-08

"What manner of Man is this, that even the wind and the sea obey Him?" Mark 4:35-41    Jesus and His disciples were in a small boat on the Sea of Galilee, and it was night. A read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1621

Good Oct. Morning 10-2-08

   "LORD, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Till seven times?" Matthew 18:21-35        It may be that the Apostle Peter had been read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1579

Good Oct. Morning 10-3-08

"Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?" Isaiah 6:8       God has given His children various commands, such as "Go, and teach all nations," Preach read more..

Shirley Choat
Shirley Choat
1606

Good Oct. Morning 10-4-08

"What has thou that thou did not receive? Now, if thou did receive it, why does thou glory as if thou had not received it?" 1 Cor. 4:7       This is a great ver read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5794

Government Pipe Specifications

1.  All pipe is to be made of a long hole, surrounded by metal or plastic centered around the hole.2.  All pipe is to be hollow throughout the entire length - do not use holes of different length than read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
6062

Family Dinner

Family dinner was an enjoyable weekly ritual for us. Although my Mother was in her late 80's she certainly still had the ability to clearly say what was on her mind.This was the first dinner on my sis... read more..

Misc
Teresa hauber
2936

Loving the fall ...

It is so nice to have the summer behind us..The only thing I miss is going out to the pool for a few minutes in the afternoon.Brrr,,,tried it once but man it is tooo cold..I have been so busy lately w... read more..

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